Thursday, November 7, 2013

Is this ride over yet?

Warning: on heavy pain Meds, not responsible for grammatical error or foul language

Brasil was lovely.... I intend to return... But not yet. The hoedown is upon us, can't believe a year has passed... It goes so quickly, especially when your asleep or sick for most of it.

I plan to recap Brasil, since returning I've been layed up thinking and I know my outline to write, now to find a time when energy, my computer and manageable pain are all in the same place. But this is my post Dr.Lin, post octreotide scan, pre Hoedown update.

Before I left for Brasil, Dr.Lin told me I shouldn't go and go right back on chemo again, indefinitely. After spending the summer sick, I just couldn't bear it... By then end of the appointment I convinced Dr.Lin this trip was much needed for my emotional and mental health, he agreed as did those of you who had been around me.

Today I found out the cost of that decision, but I will tell you it was much worth it.... Brasil was lovely.

I've been in pain for a few weeks now, it was progressive and by the time I got home on the doctor scale of pain I was a 10, the word "SEVERE" in blinking neon white blinked when I closed my eyes! I thought maybe kidney stones.... Could it be that I have something wrong with me that is not directly cancer related? Of course not, I am a healthy cancer patient! This morning, after 3 days of scans and looking at my favorite nebula ceiling art... Dr.Lin confirmed the cancer has taken up residence in my lymphnodes, making them swell pressing on nerves and causing the "SEVERE" pain.


It looks as if some more chemotherapy running concurrent with radiation therapy are in my very near future.... I can see that this holiday season , as the last 2, will be providing unique physical gifts.... No surgery this year tho:)

Ill set up shop in Spokane, working with highly recommended doctors from Dr.Lin..... So were not running back and forth over the pass....

My last Dr.Lin appointment before leaving for Brasil  I  came to a realization about this new life I am now living......  I have cancer, I live with cancer and I manage my life with cancer in it. Since my diagnosis I feel like I've been chasing the rabbit around the track, and at some point I'll reach the finish. It wasn't until Dr.Lin said IVchemotherapy indefinately I realized this is now my life.... There may be no finish line. I e said many times, will say it again, I am grateful for the perspective cancer has given me in my life, I believe I am a better person because of my diagnosis, for myself and those around me.... But I am kind of done. I want to get off this  rollercoaster, doesn't cancer know I'm busy! I want to be able to DO & GO, and not be prisoner of being sick.... I want to EXPLORE & find my PASSION in work.... And I want to LOVE freely without feeling vulnerable because I'm sick. It's kind of like having a house guest who has overstayed their welcome.

I have seen this cancer free self in my minds eye, in Rio I walked the streets a healthy, happy girl with not a care in the world..... I recently lived this and know what it looks like.... I just need my body to catch up with my mind, soul and heart.  I am ready for this next battle, I just really want it to be the battle  before I pull out my troops and declare victory! I ask for you help...... As you all have always and continue  to give.... Your love, prayers and of course good ju-ju are needed.

Obrigado! Love to you all.... And hope to see as many of you as possible at the Hoedown Saturday... Supporting those who are also on the rollercoaster with Community Cancer Services!

~S


Thursday, October 24, 2013

Home from Brazil


    Sara is home from her trip to Brazil.  She had an amazing journey and met with John of God.  The results of this experience will be told when she meets with Dr. Lin again and has more tests done. So, we are back to waiting. I will let her tell the story.  But she is home safe and sound. Bentley and Liza are thrilled. She traveled to Rio and Ipanema. She went hang gliding. Just looking at the pictures gives me vertigo.
    Hoedown still goin' down. November 9 at the HIVE on first avenue in Sandpoint. All proceeds going to the Sandpoint Cancer Center.
     Will keep posting on here, stay glued.



posted by Colleen

Monday, October 7, 2013

Brazil cont.

                                        


                                                                 Still in Brazil.....

Friday, October 4, 2013

Brazil

   

    Sara is in Brazil right now.  She planned to go early last summer and
after getting an okay from Dr. Lin after her last treatment, she went.  She is staying in Abadiania, Goias, Brazil and is at the John of God retreat.
    She has received a spiritual surgery and we have not heard of any results from this experience as of yet. Her tumor is still being a little %$#%^ and is mutating.  When she returns she will go directly to Seattle and be scanned and tested for her counts and then be treated accordingly.
    Anyone can research John of God and view videos of him and his treatments.  He is well renowned and also has a book out.
    So, there is not much to say right now as we are all waiting to hear from Sara. Her communication is limited.
    Also, the Second Annual Hoedown is scheduled and in the works. All proceeds will go to the Sandpoint Cancer Center. Find your boots!

Friday, September 13, 2013

September 2013

    Hi. I am on Sara's computer at the purple house. Way over my head here. {McIntosh} Anyway, just getting back on here to update everyone. Sara has been getting intravenous chemo since the beginning of August. She is in Seattle now doing her third treatment.  Shanna came to Sandpoint to stay here and take excellent care of her {and vacuum the crap outta the purple house..} Sara was pretty much in bed and still is because this chemo is kicking everyone's ass. This cancer is really getting irritating and we are  just about over it.  Sara is going to Brazil to John of God as soon as she is able. This is okay with Dr. Lin.
    Big kudos to Amber Kohal today for delivering to Seattle Sara's chemo that was here and Dr. Lin wanted her to start on it again. It had to be refrigerated and kept cold all the way there and Amber performed like a pro. Considering she and her Dad run the Flying Fish Company in Sandpoint on 5th avenue, refrigeration and travel does not scare her.
     Lauren is still doing acupuncture on Sara. She is now treating her for the mutation of the cancer cells.  The cancer mutates way faster than any treatment can keep up with it. It is a horrible monster and right now Sara, even though she is Wonder Woman, is trying to fight Superman all by herself. Time to bring out the big guns. We need all the good vibes and energy coming this way. Right now. We are so close to finally Kicking some major behind.  Send lightning strikes.
       Which also brings up the second annual Dalebout Kicking Cancer's Ass Hoedown on November 9th in Sandpoint. Proceeds going to the CCS in Sandpoint that helps so many people.  T shirts are on order.
    I will be back on here updating the blog. Big thanks to everyone who has pitched in to help. And big TU to Gail Lyster for walking the dogs every morning to wear them out. That was a huge help. It was pretty chaotic for a while here, and it certainly kept Sara distracted from being sick.  My sister Shannon drops by and laundry is done, dishes are done and there is a jar of homemade jelly on the counter. Other sister, Lois, runs for scripts and does errands. Sara has way too many people that LOVE her SO much.  I love her the most and and glad I bought her that Christmas Barbie at the White Elephant in Spokane when she would not leave the store without it.  Costs us $14 bucks. Don't worry, we still have it.
    Stay tuned here.
    Thanks everyone!!



Posted by Colleen

Thursday, June 13, 2013

The Roller Coaster called life....

I know I don't post often, (thank you mom and sissy)... social media is a time killer!  But have realized documentation of this ride needs to happen.  So those who read it great, if anything its to keep me straight.

We call life a roller coaster.... I am a believer.  My chalkboard reads "Breathe, Bike/Run, Balance, Be Still, Listen, Slow Down", it's all to make my body able to fight off multiplying cancer cells.  I am untraining behaviors and retraining to be calm.... it is a lot harder than you I ever thought.

Roadtripped to Canada with Bentley and Lou, beautiful country.... I learned my dogs are patient, Banff and British Columbia are beautiful and I'm grateful for good brakes on my car.  The 1700 mile trip ended in Seattle with Dr. Lin's smiling face and time with my sister's awesome family... perfect.  So this is the roller coaster.... 2 days of scans showed no new tumors!  Tumor markers from my blood draw at BGH before I left showed they were not in the red, 86, but still double from my draw in April, 46.  "If we can stabilize you in that range, that is the goal" Dr. Lin says.  He has me taking a combination of meds with my chemo that will create an enviroment in my body that hopefully cancer cells don't thrive....  I left happy and optimistic, even though the meds are anxiety drivers and depressents I try to ignore it... my roller coaster ride....I was at the height of the loop-de-loop with his good news and smile.

Then Tuesday I get a Dr. Lin phone call.  Tumor marker (called chromogranin A) from my visit last week is at 111.  BOOM... down the loop-de-loop I go.  Still within a good range (80-90 is the norm ceiling), but trending up.  He reminds me that my scans were clear, phewwwwww.... but with them going up I dread to see dark spots next scan.  Sooooo we double the anxiety and depressent meds.. so if having cancer doesn't bum you out, the meds will.  Frustration looms, anxiety is constant, so I will distract myself with whatever I can.

My goal is to stay healthy with food, exercise and postive life experiences, which all of you are part of and I am so grateful, so if I haven't said thank you, I thank you.

I am going to Brazil to see John of God in September with my loyal flight instructor and friend Chris Rinehart. He is a world renowned spiritual hearler who has healed people from all over the world.... not to mention the casa itself is supposed to be an amazing place of healing.  I've decided Western medicine has gotten me this far, I want to exhaust all resources... until then I am trying to prepare my mind and body for what september will bring.  Go to the link below if interested more:
http://www.johnofgod.com/index.php/about-john-of-god.html

Life is beautiful, savor it, love it, regardless of where you are on the roller coaster the hard times make you stronger and make the times at the top of the loop-de-loop sweeter:)

Love to all!
~S
Last day of trip, waiting for the last ferry to Seattle.... 



Banff was amazing.....

Bentley, Lou and I @ Lake Louise:)



Friday, April 26, 2013

Healthy Lifestyle...Let us begin.

    We just came back from an appointment with Dr. Lin. It was all about Sara  D. Concentrating on herself and getting really healthy and RESTED.
   She will be on affinitor  now which is the oral maintenance chemo. She won't be working for a while because working interferes with the chemo.  Or, chemo interferes with working. But whatever, she is not working at this time.  I will say Coldwater Creek has been hugely supportive of Sara and we are all so grateful for that.
    It seems she has been highly successful in treatment even though sometimes it did not appear so.
From the very beginning, Dr. Lin's objective was to get her to this point, taking the maintenance chemo and being able to live normally.  The process of this result is mind boggling and a case of the more you know, the more you know you don't know.
    We decided to continue this blog because Sara's story is going to affect a lot of people who have or will experience what she has.  Only because of her experience, their road will be less bumpy. And they will need a fantastic Doctor, of course.  So we are going to continue this Cancer Kicking blog.
    Happy Spring. It sure is. Love y'all!



posted by Colleen


Monday, February 18, 2013

February 18, 2013

    Sara is back to work and back to normal life.  That is, normal for her.  She is on a maintenance chemo treatment that makes her feel very tired, but not too sick. So I will be posting further and further between blog posts because I hope I will have nothing to say. {which will never happen...}.
It feels like a huge rock has fallen out of our pockets and the future spreads out before us like a clean chalkboard.  We are all so excited and happy.  Each day is a gift.  And I did not see that on a Hallmark card, I said it myself from my heart.
    It is truly a privilege to know so many fantastic people and to experience the unbelievable response in a time of crisis. This quote came bouncing back to me from the old days...

    " The world is not so bad a place as some would like to make it.  But whether good or whether bad, depends on how you take it."

   
Posted by Colleen

   

Thursday, February 7, 2013

February 7, 2013

"Scans were clear.... Chromogranin A normal, no addtnl surgery.... Will be in Seattle once a month to meet with Dr. Lin to make sure the oral chemo is working and we don't see any surprises "pop" up:-) Dr.Lin used my Oncoplex results to explain why my cells went crazy and to prescribe my maintenance, one of the first patients to benefit from this new medical option! I'm outta the weed for the second time.... Now to keep it that way:-) thanks to all for love & support, and cheers to good health! (I'm emailing Dr.Park to tell him some can win the lottery twice:-)"

    Exactly two years ago the 'fit hit the shan' for my family.  I tore my minuscus, our rental house had been destroyed by drug addicts and was surounded by cops from 3 counties, Dave was in the process of getting a hip replacement, my sister was in the hospital with only God knew what, two babies were joining our family, my brother was on his way to the emergency room to consequently leave this world and Sara was diagnosed with cancer.
    My Mom always said you only got as much as you could handle, but seriously?  
    So today we are all celebrating Sara kicking cancer's ass with all the help from all of you. The way everyone jumped on board to help her get through this is completely overwhelming. Sara is truly the strongest person I know. The last two years have been like walking under water. Today it is time to take a deep breath and get back on the horse.
    We are so grateful to Dr. Lin and Dr. Park for being so smart.
I have a lot more running through my mind to say, but it all sounds too mushy. You can all read between the lines.  Here's to a great day and to miracles!


Love to all. 

posted by Colleen



Saturday, January 12, 2013

January 12, 2013

    Well, Happy  New Year!  And it is for us. Sara went to Seattle last week for her last big dose of chemo.   It made her pretty sick but the chemo is working.  Dr. Lin said he wanted her to do the full four rounds of this treatment as it was working so well.  Her dad and mom {me} took her to Coeur d' Alene for her treatment yesterday. Her blood count was high enough to get her next to the last dose. Next friday, she will go to Cda for, hopefully her very last dose of intraveinous chemo.  Being able to go to Cda has been a big relief.  Then back to Seattle for an octreatide scan to determine the next step. 
    Dr. Lin has not decided yet how to do the maintenance chemo, but we have total confidence in his decisions.
    There is not much to report at this time as we are just getting Sara through these next few weeks. I will update this blog at that time, then hope that we will become very boring and no one will even bother to check this anymore. 
    The past two years have been a whirlwind of ups and downs and inside outs.  I know other people have had their own struggles and I can only hope they have experienced the support we have. I know Sara D. has been an inspiration to everyone. {She makes me feel like a big cry baby.}
    So check back later and See whassup.  Thanks to everyone and much love.



Posted by Colleen